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How frequently must a question be asked before it's a
frequently-asked question?
I'll answer any question I'm asked often enough that I feel inclined to
answer it.
Who are you?
I am what I am; I play like I play. I am the Sky Loser.
You seem to write your name strangely. How is it formatted
correctly?
I accept a number of styles as ‘correct’ ways to write my name. Informally,
‘Kyle’ or ‘KDP’ are great. My initials can be styled as either ‘KDPR’ or
‘K.D.P.R.’ (I prefer the former). My full name can be written as
‘Kyle D.P. Ross’, ‘K.Ross’, ‘KDP Ross’, or ‘K.D.P.Ross’ (I prefer the last,
but my signature is the penultimate.). I try to pronounce and spell others'
names as they wish; I appreciate when people do the same for me.
Why do you have a Web site?
This site's purpose is to offer a view of myself and of the way I see the
world. It provides information about my photography, may life, and my
academic endeavours. I'm sure it aims to fulfil some desire to be
understood by others. If people don't care, fine; if they read it every
day, fine. If they are bored and never visit the site again, fine. It's
just here to be here.
My site also serves as a test case for many of my toy programming
projects—it is generated by WebGen and SubCode, versioning is done
through KVS, and numerous other unreleased tools and scripts are involved
invisibly in making it a highly-over-engineered little project.
Why do you call yourself a ‘traveller’ / ‘explorer’?
I've lived in quite a number of places during my adult life (see chart
below), and I travel whenever I've the opportunity. Seeing new places,
interacting with people from various cultures, trying foods that come from
traditions very different to my culinary background, and experiencing life
under an assortment of conditions has moulded my character, my conceptual
model of the world, and my my life goals more than have my genes, my
family, or my formal education. I am terribly privileged in having had the
ability to have moved round, and I wish that the World were a fairer place
and that everybody could at least make one ‘grand expedition’—one long,
life-altering travel to a distant land. If I had one wish, it would be to
completely eliminate the use of fossil fuels; if I had two, I would also
eliminate poverty; and, if I had three, I would grant every person the
opportunity and responsibility to live in a foreign land for several years
as a child: By interacting with other people, we realise that there are
unique challenges and abilities that each of us has, and we also realise
that we are all the same in certain senses—we all wish to have good food,
clean water, comfortable shelter, fulfilling work, and time for leisure to
pursue our highest aspirations, to achieve something during the short time
that we have on Earth between being born and dying.
What are you doing these days?
I am in Seattle, working at Microsoft for the summer on the C# team.
I'll be here until mid-September. When I'm not at work, I'm drinking wine,
enjoying the sun and the lovely outdoors, reading a bit,
and—soon!—diving.
What do you want to do with your life?
I've some ideas, but ‘mum’'s the word for now on that.
Do you like doing things outdoors?
Absolutely! I enjoy hiking, kayaking, wandering the beach, and scuba diving
(Ask me to show you my dive knife sometime: It's extremely sexy.). I'd like
to try camping, but I've not found anybody who will take me yet (Hint,
hint.).
I'll soon be returning to Blooming to return to my position as a Ph.D.
candidate.
What? You worked at Microsoft?
Yes! I spent the summers of 2008 and 2009 as an intern at Microsoft working
on the Visual Studio F# language service and on refactorings for
C# and Visual Basic. I still don't know why all of the development
tools are named ‘Visual <tool-name>’.
Why do you idolise Hemingway?
I really enjoy his work, and—although I don't know so much about
him—his life was fascinating and unusual. As I once wrote: ‘I love
Hemingway, for in his writings I can see that another soul saw the world as
I do.’. His ability with words is something I admire incredibly; I wish I
could be as good at something—anything—as he was at
writing, but, alas, we're not all marked for genius. Anyhow, I think his
words are better than anything I could write here:
| It was a frightfully hot day. We'd jammed an absolutely
perfect barricade across the bridge. It was simply
priceless. A big old wrought-iron gating from the front
of a house. Too heavy to lift and you could shoot
through it and they would have to climb over it. It was
absolutely topping. They tried to get over it, and we
potted them from forty yards. They rushed it, and
officers came out alone and worked on it. It was as
absolutely perfect obstacle. Their officers were very
fine. We were frightfully put out when we heard the
flank was gone, and we had to fall back.
| _In Our Time_
| | Some made the long drop from the apartment or the
office window; some took it quietly in two-car garages
with the motor running; some used the native tradition
of the Colt or Smith and Wesson; those well-constructed
implements that end insomnia, terminate remorse, cure
cancer, avoid bankruptcy, and blast an exit from
intolerable positions by the pressure of a finger;
those admirable American instruments so easily carried,
so sure of effect, so well designed to end the American
dream when it becomes a nightmare, their only drawback
the mess they leave for the relatives to clean up.
| _To Have and Have Not_
| | While the bombardment was knocking the trench to pieces
at Fossalta, he lay very flat and sweated and prayed oh
jesus christ get me out of here. Dear jesus please get
me out. Christ please please please christ. If you'll
only keep me from getting killed I'll do anything you
say. I believe in you and I'll tell every one in the
world that you are the only one that matters. Please
please dear jesus. The shelling moved further up the
line. We went to work on the trench and in the morning
the sun came up and the day was hot and muggy and
cheerful and quiet. The next night back at Mestre he
did not tell the girl he went upstairs with at the
Villa Rossa about Jesus. And he never told anybody.
| _In Our Time_ |
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Do you really eat only once a day?
Not any longer. I've started eating breakfast, usually a small bowl of
granola. I also, occasionally, have a snack in the afternoon.
Do you smoke?
Although I very much enjoyd Cubanos in the past, I've entirely quit smoking
for a combination of reasons.
Do you drink?
Yes. I weigh ... well, not much so I can't drink
too
much before I feel something, but I don't see competition as the point of
drinking—it should be about enjoying a nice drink, most preferably with
someone (or ones) whose company you enjoy: Friends, family, significant
others, etc. I enjoy wine, pastis, cognac, calvados, whiskey, and (gin)
martinis. I trust my pal, in large part thanks to
G.V..
What is your martini recipe?
I'm
so
very glad you asked! Here's what I've been using recently: Combine 5,5 cl
of Bombay (fresh out of the freezer), 0,5 cl of Cinzano, and a few ice
cubes in a shaker. Shake vigorously until the shaker is uncomfortably cold
against your fingers. Strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Add 2 olives
(just dump them in, no skewering). Smile and enjoy. (If anyone has a
different favourite recipe, I'd
love
to hear about it!)
Did you really invent the Marmite-&-hummus sandwich?
Indeed, yes. During the summer of 2009, when I was in Seattle after
returning from Central America, I was in the kitchen one day (26th August,
just after 17.00, in fact) with two slices of ciabatta—one with a
generous layer of Marmite and the other thickly spread with home-made
hummus. Fearing that the Marmite slice would be too salty, I made the bold
and daring move of combining the two, thus unleashing the
Marmite-&-hummus on the world. Like most of my creations, I do not expect
that it will bring me fame or fortune; neither do I suspect that it will
achieve widespread adoption per se, but I find it one of the most delicious
and satisfying sandwich-eating experiences. It is, to be sure, a first-rate
sandwich that can hold its own against the other greats: Tomato, brie, &
mustard; peanut butter & garlic; and mozzarella, aubergine, &
balsamico.
Are you insane?
No, I am not; I'm eccentric.
What's with the fountain pen thing?
I love my laptops and Google phone dearly, but they can't replace the
zillions of scraps of paper that I write notes on ... and then misplace.
Fountain pens just feel better and are so much less wasteful—one can
refill them, and I don't lose them because they cost too much to replace.
Besides the occasional ink on my hands is a refreshing contrast to their
ordinary cleanliness.
Why do you carry knives all the time?
Knives are useful for more things than one can imagine—cutting one's
food, culling loose threads from clothing, removing spines from aggressive
cactus fruits, hacking through brush, rescuing poisonous caterpillars that
are entangled in spiders' webs in the jungle, ‘customising’ bandages to
smaller / different sizes, deflating balloons, etc. I use my own knives at
restaurants because I've tired of the dull, mostly-useless ones that are
provided. If you
don't
carry a knife at all times then I question your sanity.
Why are you so judgemental?
I have strong opinions, and I don't hesitate to share them. They frequently
run against conventional ‘wisdom’, and I often assert absurdisms in an
attempt—one largely in vain, I'm afraid—to encourage people to
reëvaluate their assumptions.
Are you religious?
Absolutely not—I am a Bright (i.e., secular humanist), as are all
rational people. Religion is an affront to reason, logic, science, and
civilisation. Believing in ridiculous fantasy worlds based on unfalsifiable
claims that lack any empirical evidence is irrational, counterproductive,
and metaphysically immature—embracing the sane conclusion that we are
alone in a World inherently devoid of meaning affords the satisfaction of
intellectual honesty and the opportunity to
construct
meaning for our existences through experience, creation, and suffering.
Are you a hippy?
Quite possibly I ought to have been born in the late 1940s / early 1950s so
that I could have gone to Woodstock and said ‘far out, man’, but I wasn't.
I am a hippy though—a hippy, by my estimations at least, is ‘one who
doesn't conform to society's standards and advocates a liberal attitude and
lifestyle’. And I do, occasionally, say ‘far out’, which is usually
followed by mockery by ... well, whomever I say it amongst. (Yes, I like
the word ‘whom’ and know how to properly use it. If you don't then you
ought to bloody well learn some grammar.)
Why are you so anti-societal?
Society's efforts to view me as a ‘productive’ machine to use for its aims
are in direct conflict with my goals of self-actualisation, independent
thinking, and experiential meaning exploration. I love every person
individually (in a strictly platonic sense), but when I see masses of
people, I can't help but feel angry and ashamed for being one of the human
race (ask me about panda documentaries some time). There isn't a problem in
the system; the system itself is the problem. ‘To make a thief, make an
owner; to create crime, create laws.’–U.K.LeGuinn.
Would you like it if I brought you chocolate?
Yes! Very much. Particularly fine, dark chocolate. (I'm partial to
chocolate from Madagascar or Belize.)
Are you a hypocrite?
Decidedly. We all are. I recognise my hypocrisy and try to reduce the
amount of disparity that exits between my beliefs and action, but I'll
never be rid of contradictions.
Why do you use ‘British’ spellings of things?
After many years of imperialism (traditional and cultural), the world uses
English. ‘American English’—with its ridiculous ‘simplified’
spelling—is only used in the States. I am a citizen of the world, not of
a country; hence, I try to act as such: I use the metric system and
international English, I refrain from using words like ‘us’ and ‘them’ in
reference to any nationality, and I don't invade countries to plunder their
oil. I dream that some day, a new language will become the default second
language—something like what the (largely-failed) Esperanto experiment
aimed to do. Some day, I hope to personally abandon English entirely, but
that's still a very long way away.
Is nothing sacred? Is there nothing that you won't mock?
No, nothing is above mockery, question, or challenge. Life is made out to
be too serious; we need to mock ourselves and one another more often. We
must hit our beliefs as hard as we can and keep only those that stand up to
the scrutiny; humour is one means of accomplishing this, of bringing light
to the absurdity of certain beliefs.
What do you do all the time?
I spend quite a bit of time on courses, research, and other work things.
That said, when I'm not working, I read, watch films, cook, visit with
friends over coffee or wine, sleep, and browse around online while
fantasising about my next escape. There is not much else to do in
Bloomington. These days, I spend much of my free time studying Spanish and
ecology.
Are you obsessed with teeth?
Yes, I like teeth, from both utilitarian and æsthetic perspectives. See
my writing on teeth.
(Returning ... some day.)
What kind of person is your ‘type’?
I have not dated in quite some years, and that is great; I am open to the
idea, should a suitable person come along who can abide my
‘eccentricities’. I haven't any sort of ‘requirements’ for a partner, but
I've a fairly good idea of the kinds of qualities somebody I would be
interested in would have: The ideal ‘significant other’ for me is someone
brilliant and charming and patient who has a sense of humour similar to
mine; someone I can sit around with and talk all day or night about
everything or equally comfortably not talk at all; someone with an open,
scientific mind; someone who doesn't believe in things like marriage and
conformity and family; someone who is fantastic but doesn't realise it;
someone who has good teeth and isn't too tall. I'm partial to people named
Kat(herine) / Kat(i)e or Julia or Sara(h) or An(n)a, but that doesn't
particularly matter. I emphasise, though, that I'm perfectly satisfied to
be single now, though, which, practically speaking, is very good.
What kind of movies are you into?
Many people (myself included) seem to think that I (usually) have good
taste in films ... and these are a few of my favourite films:
- _My Man Godfrey_, G.La Cava, 1936
- _Citizen Kane_, O.Welles, 1941
- _Casablanca_, M.Curtiz, 1942
- _It's a Wonderful Life_, F.Capra, 1946
- _Sunset Blvd_, B.Wilder, 1950
- _The Ten Commandments_, C.B.DeMille, 1956
- _The Thirty-Nine Steps_, A.Hitchcock, 1959
- _Dr No_, T.Young, 1962
- _Lawrence of Arabia_, D.Lean, 1962
- _Dr Strangelove or: How I Learnt to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb_, S.Kubrick, 1964
- _The Graduate_, M.Nichols, 1967
- _Easy Rider_, D.Hopper, 1969
- _Harold and Maude_, H.Ashby, 1971
- _The Godfather_, F.F.Coppola, 1972
- _Apocalypse Now_, F.F.Coppola, 1979
- _Star Wars: Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back_, F.Kershner, 1980
- _Top Gun_, T.Scott, 1986
- _Heathers_, M.Lehmann, 1987
- _The Princess Bride_, R.Reiner, 1987
- _Dead Poets Society_, P.Weir, 1989
- _The Hunt for Red October_, J.McTiernan, 1990
- _The Silence of the Lambs_, J.Demme, 1991
- _The Crying Game_, N.Jordan, 1992
- _The Shawshank Redemption_, F.Darabont, 1994
- _Abre Los Ojos_, A.Amenábar, 1997
- _Lolita_, A.Lyne, 1997
- _Mononoke Hime_, H.Miyazaki, 1997
- _The Big Lebowski_ J.Coen 1998
- _Croupier_, M.Hodges, 1998
- _What Dreams May Come_, V.Ward, 1998
- _American Beauty_, S.Mendes, 1999
- _American Movie: The Making of Northwestern_, C.Smith, 1999
- _The Matrix_, A.Wachowski/L.Wachowski, 1999
- _K-Pax_, I.Softley, 2001
- _The Royal Tenenbaums_, W.Anderson, 2001
- _The Pianist_, R.Polanski, 2002
- _Pumpkin_, A.Abrams/A.Broder, 2002
- _Thirteen_, C.Hardwicke, 2003
- _Le Scaphandre et Le Papillon_, J.Schnabel, 2007
I don't have copies of movies in
italics
if you have a copy you'd like to give me, I'd be most appreciative! (For
_Mononoke Hime_, the English-dubbed version—although well-done—will
not
suffice.)
Because I was curious (and had slightly too much time) one afternoon and
because I
love
charts and graphs, I made this plot (current as of 14 January 2009) of
films per year in my collection. Apparently, I've an abundance of 2002
films with smaller spikes (relative to nearby years) in 1954 and 1988.
Is this list of FAQ's going to go on and on and on for ever?
Yes.
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